Tomorrow's is Marielle's [my sister] birthday. She turns twelve, but you wouldn't think that when you look at her. She's tall [even taller than my mom], big-boned and some people even mistake her for my older sister. My family and I went to the mall today, and she bought some clothes, and books and got a Game Pak that was my parents' gift to her. I guess being fair comes with being a lawyer so for the sake of fairness, my dad got me a hooded top and two books by Lois Duncan. I plan to wear my top tomorrow, when I go with my mom to get my report card. I won't be able to wear it for anything else afterwards--I'm gonna die, remember?

My whole life seems kinda pointless right now. I sleep, I wake up, I go to school, I come home, I sleep. And nothing new ever happens. I never was the popular, noisy type, and I do study and write a little but even that is not enough for me to make my mark in the world. Oh well, I will find ways to make it--but I'm not going to think about it yet.

At the moment, Mako is at a debut of a friend of his. Kathy's going to be there, which partly explains my foul mood. For those of you who don't know, a debut is some sort of silly formal party Filipino girls hold when they turn eighteen. They have eighteen candles and eighteen roses and such. When I turn eighteen, I'm having a big, noisy party that will end at three in the morning I've got no time to waltz in a slinky gown with eighteen freaks. Then there's always the prom, but I'm thinking of skipping that, too.

Something interesting happened at choir rehearsal today. For some strange reason, I was in a good mood when I went to rehearsal today (maybe it was because I arrived late). I'd waved to some people and noticed that there was this newbie sitting in the soprano two area. I couldn't tell what her age was, since she wore really thick, disgusting-looking makeup--the kind of makeup prostitues around here wear. I stared at her a little--partly out of curiousity and partly because I was like, "What is she wearing?" But after that, I didn't pay much attention to her. I'd noticed however, that she was giving Apple and me these mean, bitchy looks when we were whispering among ourselves.

Finally, when rehearsal started, she spoke up. Since Whorechick was standing behind Apple and me and we were already singing, we couldn't turn around to glare at her. But she was really defensive. "Is something wrong with my face? Come on, tell me. You two have been giving me those looks the whole time. Next time, I don't want you to look at me that way, understand?" That irritated me, and I turned around to say, "I wasn't looking at you." I had planned to add, "I wasn't looking at you because you're not worth looking at. If you really want the truth, my problem with your face is that I think you need to have plastic surgery. If I was influential enough to make humanity stop looking at your face, I'd really make them do it for fear that everyone in this world woud lose their eyesight due to [your] intense ugliness." But of course, I couldn't because a) I was afraid to start a fight (I can be human sometimes, you know) and b) because the choir conductress doesn't like talking during rehearsal. So I ignored the overdone freak. When she learned, however, that I had been in the choir for three years already, she had become much nicer. Or was she just kissing my ass?

I wish I was psychic. Sometimes, I think I am but I can't really be too sure. I saw a book about scrying at the bookstore today and I wanted to buy it, but I bet my dad wouldn't let me. He's paying for it, and he might question me about it. I'm really interested in the occult and stuff but it's against Catholicism or something to practice stuff like that so the most I could do is to read about it. Even that is hard because I am always broke.

Anyway, please pray that I don't fail anything tomorrow.