Hi, it's me, and I'm going to court you!

We went to look at some houses down South and we've finally decided that we'd go live in that place which is one hour or so away from here. But it will be just 30 minutes away from the country club we go to and the air is smog-free something we need for 3 asthmatics in the family. My parents said that Stephen's school is a little far away from where we're going to live and that they're thinking of transferring me to one of the nearby schools. Heck, no! I'd hate to sound like a real snob, but what if the people who go in the local schools are total hicks or something? No way, uh-uh. I guess that means I'll have to make sure that a school bus from Stephen's school drops by that area. If not, then I'm dead meat. And there's the problem of having delayed telephone lines which means no internet connection but I guess I'll survive for a while without it.

I think courtship is stupid. Really. It's tradition here in the Philippines that if the guy wants the girl, he must shower her with gifts and stuff like that there in order to win their heart. If someone who I like (cause I'll probably give hints) has to ask me out, they have to ask me out directly like, "Lauryn, let's go out with each other" or something like that . I think this whole courting business is so materialistic and sadistic. Sadistic because the tortured guy waits for weeks/months to get the girl's "yes". The girl can't say "yes" on the first week or else she will look too eager. Then, how can measly material gifts measure someone's love for you? He doesn't even earn money yet and would have to suffer and save up on his allowance. I think being creative works better. And how dare you judge him by what he gives you? In the olden days, the guy and his buds would march off to the girl's house and serenade her. While they sing the girl shyly goes out to the balcony (our house has one) to display herself, and then her father comes and pours water on her poor suitor's head ( if he doesn't like him). And if the girl is a real sadist , she'll let the courtship drag on and on for months, maybe even years, so that she doesn't seem easy catch or something. And what about the parents who raised the real sadist? They're sadists themselves! They interrogate the poor suitor about what he did from the day he was born until the present. What kind of sh*t is that supposed to be? I am so glad I'm living in the 00s (what the hell am I supposed to call the year 2000?) but still courtship is the norm. What is it with guys and love anyway? This is madness!

Guess what, this year's a leap year and every leap year, the whole courtship thing goes vice versa; it's the girl who asks the guy out. Hmm, I wonder which guy should I go for this leap year. Ahh well, I've got plenty of time to decide; I'm going to a school with guys so there should be lots of options for me.

Martin just emailed me and he's in Hongkong right now. He's just a mere 3 hours away from me and we're actually in the same time zone. He wrote something like this:

"We went to mass today. WOW! You wont believe me. I can't put in words how crowded it was. You'll think I'm exaggerating but I SWEAR I'm not!!!! Okay, there was a mass EVERY HOUR between 7AM-7PM. THAT'S A LOT OF MASSES. PLUS the churches were PACKED. There were literally lines to get in. We couldn't find a place to sit in one mass, so we waited in line for the next. Even then, I was scrunched and utterly uncomfortable! It was very very very devout. I've never seen little girls praying the rosary without being told. I've never seen teenage boys teaching their little sisters how to pray. The mass' congregation was made up of around 50% Chinese and 50% Filipinos. Almost all of them took communion on the tongue, it was pretty cool. ;-)"

Well that's how our churches are like too over here and rosary praying is common so it was hard for Martin to understand what I have been trying to tell him all these years. He has learned. He should see the Philippines then he'll even want to live here and be a priest. Hopefully, he'll call me tonight.

I believe on what Aristotle said that "we should behave to our friends as we would wish our friends to behave to us". Same as what Confucius said that " what you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others" . So, if things aren't working out for you, it's time to look at yourself and not blame it on others. As the Buddhist also say, "one should seek for others the happiness one desires for one's self". It's like karma. For example, if someone dumped you like sh*t , it was probably because in the past , you dumped someone else like sh*t and now you're paying for it . Well , I don't think we have to blame our past for everything . I just think that's how life works sometimes. "Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them", as St. Matthew also says.

My head hurts, probably from all that Final Fantasy VIII playing. I think I need a break from it or something. Once you start playing it you have a hard time stopping cause something new keeps on happening, and that's why I end up playing for hours sometimes. I dunno, maybe I'll go to bed early tonight. I feel kinda sleepy.

Not that I'm suicidal or anything but I wonder what it's like to be dead. I dunno, just for fun, sometimes I imagine people in my funeral and saying stuff like, "Oh, Lauryn was this and that...." I wonder if anyone would miss me if I was dead. Ever since my CLE teacher told me what hell was like, I'd stopped saying, "I hope you burn in hell!" to the people I hate cause I definitely don't want to burn in hell. I don't think I'm good enough for heaven cause I've done a lot of unholy things but I haven't killed anyone or anything like that so I don't think I'll go to hell either. I wonder where I'll end up when I'm dead. I wonder if I'll ever see the people I love when I'm dead.

Ugh, I swear, bored people will talk about anything just to get unbored. I'd better return to my FF8 before I get any morbid than I am now.